Pressing on…

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I have had to reflect  a lot this year, I have had to ask myself some deep questions; one of those questions was why do I actually believe in God-why do I actually declare Jesus to those I meet?

Worldly pressures at times can throw you in a place whereby walking away from God seems like the better option- holding onto your own strength and might seems better than trusting in a God who says is with you but whom you have never seen! I mean-why am I enduring troubles-why am I being patient in the midst of persecution? Essentially-why do I endure all that I do hoping that tomorrow will be better-what I am hoping for actually?

Friend, have you been so challenged in your life that you feel like everything will shatter around you but for some odd reason-you still continue, you still press on, you don’t understand how you are still moving, but you are just putting one foot in front of the other?

There came a point in my life whereby I asked God how he allowed me to be in the career I am in when at times  it feels like I am being thrown in a cage full of lions-everyday, and he expects me to keep moving-regardless of the trials I face! Sometimes I want to run-but I cannot, sometimes I want to hide-but this force within me says:  you aren’t born to hide, sometimes I want to be complacent but a voice within me says:  do everything as if it is unto me! I have wrestled with God  , I have begged, I have stopped praying, I have fasted for God to take me out, but one thing remained-God said I will overcome!

There are scriptures I read when I was happy and let me tell you something, the word of God sinks even deeper when we are hard-pressed, there is something about pressure that causes our hearts to yield more to God’s word. One of those scriptures was in James where he says we must count it all joy when we face trials of many kinds-for our faith is being made strong ( James 1:2).

Man, if you read that scripture to me a couple of months ago-I would’ve decorated it and posted it on my Facebook page with smiley faces because it sounds really nice, fast track to now- it is as real to me as the air I breath, it is so real because I am realising that my joy truly is not tied to the things of this world-God is allowing me to face what I face so that I can actually disengage my soul from being tied to what my flesh is tied to. The Lord says don’t fear the one who can destroy the flesh-fear the one who can destroy both the soul and flesh( Matthew 10:28).

Essentially I believe in God because truly there are things I have tried to do in my own strength in which I have found myself fail. There are things I have tried to pursue in my own strength only to have those doors closed when I had been so sure that they were opened! God has humbled me in a way only I can understand. I declare his name to those who don’t know it because truly he has transformed my way of thinking. I go through hard times but I always know that I will make it because each and every word he has spoken in the Bible has come true in my life. I have tried and tested the word of God and let me tell you-it is always correct! God’s word can’t fail-it will never fail.

I can go through trials and be hard-pressed knowing deep down that the Lord is holding my hand-he promised to never forsake or leave me.

I may face the lions everyday but none is greater than the Lion of Judah-none has overcome him, I carry his name, I am covered by his blood and I am guided by his spirit! The darkness was overcome more than 2000 years ago-God knows that even if the darkness threatens to consume us-it can’t because it was defeated! He can allow us to face the darkness because he knows that his light is greater and it already consumed it.

I believe because I have seen the Light, I believe because I am a light-I believe because I belong to the Light!

Blessings

 

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Fezile, the one whom God loves

 

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It’s Christmas day and I am behind a PC 🙂

I couldn’t go to bed without writing this post-today I went to church and as I was sitting watching the speaker share the message I realised that God gave me life, God gave me time and God has given me love.

As I reflected on what my Saviour has done for me I was filled with tremendous joy. The word says we have every spiritual blessing (Ephesians) and today it hit me that everything the word says I have-I truly have.

As I reflect on my life, I realised that if I were to go to Heaven now-I would have peace, not only  because I would be in my Saviour’s arms-but I would have peace that I used everything the Lord told me to use and I have done what the Lord has said I must do-there is nothing more beautiful than that-to be in the complete will of God.

I used to think that if I had more money or a better house or many cars I would be complete-but friends, Jesus completes me, Jesus is my answer to the world’s deepest pain-Jesus is my everything.

I thank God that when he died for me more than 2000 years ago-he saw Fezile before him and he said I love her so much that I am willing to lay my life down for her. Jesus saw my whole life before him, my mistakes, my failures, my flaws-but even in all that-he still chose to die for me!

I boast of God’s love because honestly that love is the only one that hasn’t demanded me to be anything else than what I am. I know God loves me, I know that I am precious to Him and I know that I matter to Him. I know that when I am sad he feels my pain because he loves me. There isn’t anyone in this world who can ever tell me otherwise concerning God’s heart for me-I can speak confidently of that love because I have a relationship with my Father, I tell him everything and I know he hears every single prayer and he makes every effort to bring comfort and hope my way-because of the love he has for me.

God’s love humbles me because I don’t deserve it BUT he gives it to me regardless.

As we celebrate Christmas-what are you grateful to God for? As you reflect on God’s love for you-how have you grown? How has God’s love changed your life?

Let me know in the comment box below.

Blessings

P.S – If you need prayers concerning anything, just type in “pray” and the minute I see your comment I will pray with you-because YOU matter to God! 

 

 

When we exclude God from our relationship

Image result for wrong relationshipI am meeting people who are in relationships that God did not send them to be in. I am meeting people who are miserable in their marriages-they had this idea that marriage was going to be a dream, effortless and instant.

Marriage with the right person is a dream, our problem is that we are becoming an impatient generation- we assess people by having our own check boxes that must be ticked off to fulfill our criteria , we claim to have consulted God but we find that the person we chose fulfills the whole checklist except being grounded in God. We are okay with dating and even marrying people who are not saved, we are okay with sidelining God in the dating process and wonder when the marriage doesn’t work out why God would lead us into that relationship.

The beautiful character of God is that he will never override your decision, we instead choose to be with people who are abusive, we choose to be with people who don’t fulfill their promises to us by allowing them to  strip us of our dignity for a moment’s pleasure.

Marriage is becoming like a drive-through, people want their needs fulfilled at no consideration of the other person; when their needs aren’t fulfilled they go outside and find someone else to fulfill their needs and forget about their vows. Vows don’t mean anything anymore-being bound by your words has no standing anymore.

You might ask- “when did we become like this?”

We became like this the moment we chose to remove God from our decision-making, we became like this the moment we sidelined God in our lives; some of us box God in and expect him to work in every area of our lives except our relationship life-we purposefully exclude God and wonder why that area is failing.

The people who I have spoken to whose relationships didn’t work out say that they suspected that the people they were with were not authentic, most say they knew, but they hoped for change.  I am seeing a pattern being formed-most people knew that the person they were with was not the real deal-so my question then is – why be with someone who God has warned you to stay away from? Why proceed into getting into a spiritual union knowing fully well that this person isn’t the one for you?

God has shown me that I too am not different from the people I am talking about in the above paragraph- I too chose to be with people who God had told me to stay away from and I too made mistakes by thinking that I could change the people I dated to become someone I wanted. God also showed me that the way I was so deceived I even thought that by dragging someone to the altar to receive the Lord Jesus into their lives would lead to all the tick boxes being fulfilled when in actual fact I hadn’t even discerned their heart (and mine) was not even centred on the Lord.

We choose people based on outwardly appearances- we go after the shine and not the heart, we go after the status and not the character, we go after the feelings and neglect the warning signs, we run after how great our Instagram and Facebook feed will look with them instead of chasing after the wisdom of God in discerning their motives. We trade our souls to become the envy of the world, we relentlessly pursue someone who beats us up-physically and emotionally because we believe that we are more valuable as people when we are with them-forgetting about the one true love that relentlessly pursues us even when we willfully walk away to pursue what breaks us.

Beloved, you don’t deserve heartache and abuse. You don’t deserve to be someone’s second-best when God has made you his first choice. My hope for you is to turn to God for help, run back into the arms of your first love-trust Him to lead and guide you again by submitting to his will. The things of God may appear to take time but his timing is purposeful, his timing is perfect.

Only God changes people, only God can tough people;s hearts to be completely transformed.

Hear the Lord’s voice today and make the necessary changes.

( Picture credit : tamcounseling.com)

 

 

 

 

 

Will it even matter?

Our obsession with materialism and superficiality has led me to take some time to really look at the fundamentals of life-to really step back and look at the bigger picture.

The bigger picture is this in most instances- we are born, we learn to walk,talk and all the development milestones that come with this stage of life; we become more aware of ourselves, carve out our identity; we branch out into the world by ourselves; we discover someone we find compatible with ourselves; we marry and see the need to expand-thus have children; we get old and frail and ultimately,yes-we die!

The beauty of this bigger picture is that LIFE happens in between, memories are built to accompany this bigger picture-struggles and challenges are met along the way, victories and joys come besides us. The beauty is that we adapt to circumstances we never knew we could possibly overcome, we make new friendships, salvage the ones that were once lost-we discover new hobbies and interests…my point is : WE LIVE!

The question is-in your living, what are you building? what are you doing with your time? If you look back at who you were five years ago-are you satisfied, can you atleast smile and say: “YES! I lived and I’m still living.” The fundamental truth about life my friend is that time moves, however, with time moving-you dont have to look back at your past and allow it to define your present; also- you don’t have to stop living because you feel like your glory years have passed-what about now? what about the future?

I sat one day and asked myself some real questions-basically what sparked this is that I have gained some weight, I looked at all my pictures from the past, the pictures I took at my most successful, pictures I took when deep down inside I was supposed to be most proud of myself, instead, most pictures I looked at I kept thinking how fat I had felt in them, how concerned with my image I was- back then I was a shadow of who I am now,but I wasn’t content. I continued to be critical and judgemental towards myself-heck, I can’t even remember the joy and fulfillment of being in the moment without entertaining harsh thoughts towards myself.

I remember looking at people in critical care, people in palliative care fighting to have a chance to have a decent quality of life-fighting to ward off the pain that came with illness, fighting to walk out into the sunshine and feel the sun on their skin, fighting to feel their legs carry them without feeling like a burden to others- and here I was busy disqualifying myself over things that really don’t matter-busy messing with my bigger picture instead of embracing it.

The thing is when you are at your deathbed-the thoughts that erode your mind aren’t going to be about your weight or what a bad public speaker you think you are, no, the thoughts I believe that come at you like a violent force are- why didn’t I run more? Why didn’t I make more of a difference in my family? What would have happened if I wrote that book?  I should have reached out to my siblings more, I wish I attended more plays that my children participated in, how did I miss the stages of my life-the growth and transformation?

The thing is my friend-regret is an open wound, we may find ways to adapt to its pain-but it remains there. The question essentially is-will it even matter that you don’t speak or write so well,that you feel you might not look so great, that you don’t have much money or you have alot of money? At the end of the day-you leave it all behind, it stays where you found it!

The most regrettable thing other than having all these things or not even having them is failure-failure to be free, failure to do the very thing that you are afraid of; and that is becoming who God called you to be, becoming YOU!

One moment you are fat-the next you are skinny, who cares. One moment you are rich, the next you are poor; you have many friends you have few friends. Does it even matter to please people, when people are just fickle. People are so fickle, they are unstable, they lack consistency-yet, we invest our all in seeking their approval and ultimately, they let us down-time and time again.

The irony is that you will read this right now and it’ll make sense, you may even ask yourself,”Lord, why do I do what I do? when I should be seeking you more and pleasing only you, because you never disappoint.” You will read this and ask yourself these kind of questions but as soon as you walk away from your screen, you will succumb right back into that prison that continues to hold you captive-the prison that you set up-the prison of your mind.

Isn’t that funny?

Why can’t you just be strong and courageous by doing what you are meant to do-what you were created to do by just trusting God and being secure in who He says you are?

Will the things you hold onto even matter when the King of Glory is before you?

Does it even matter?

Your destiny is tied to God

destinyAs I write this I am thinking of all the times I have tried to impress others,times I have “sucked up” to people to try to have things turn in my favour; times I have laughed at a joke that was not funny all in the name of saving face with my seniors.

I look back and I realise how pathetic it was-actually how immature it was really. In those moments I forgot key scriptures-I forgot that when I have favour with God, I also have favour with man, I also forgot that the Spirit in me is greater than the one in the world, heck I even forgot that God is the one who establishes the work of my hands. One thing that my husband always reminds me of is the fact that if something is meant for me-that if God wants to give me something-I won’t need to do anything to get it because it has my name written on it. I don’t need to convince anyone to give me something that rightfully belongs to me. So,with that said-why do we do it? We do it because we FORGET our identity in Christ. We do it because we don’t STRENGTHEN the word of God in our lives. We do it because we are fearful about losing the things we hope to have. Allow me to elaborate on each one. How do we forget our identity in Christ? We listen to the things that contradict the Word of God.  We believe more in our current realities than in the realities of heaven. It’s harder to believe for something when you don’t have an immediate need fulfilled. The flesh reminds you that you need money to pay your rent or bond-instead of praying and strengthening ourselves in the word-we worry. We forget to remind ourselves about our identity in Christ-we forget about the promises of God and so fall into the trap of people-pleasing and fear to meet our needs. That which controls you has power over you-what controls you? Secondly we don’t strengthen ourselves in the Word. We are not of this world,the Word says, so if we aren’t of this world we need to keep ourselves updated of the world we come from-if we don’t do that we begin to forget the ways of our world and adopt the ways of this world. The Word,not only updates us, but it feeds our souls;also the word does more-it strengthens us by reminding us of Gods promises and his faithfulness. When we don’t read the word and meditate on it we wither-we accept things that sound like the truth but aren’t the truth-we adopt foreign ways,we embrace our current reality. Lastly,we are fearful about losing the things we hope to have. We live in a world that is very superficial and materialistic. Success is  defined by what you have and who you are wearing and what you are driving. Most of our desires come from what we see on billboards,social media and our friends. We live in a world were we are told that to fit in and be noticed you must have certain things. Fear enters when we realise that we aren’t very close to attaining those things,we become hopeless because we realise that God’s way is taking to long-or it’s not even moving at all. We succumb to the pressures around us and allow the flesh and fear to drive us to attaining our social standing. What’s sad about the flesh is that it knows no bounds-it drives us to discontentment in our lives,it drives us to minimise and even nullify the existence and magnitude of God. How does one stop this cycle-the word says that we must pray in all seasons-that means in good and bad times,PRAY! Prayer elevates us to embrace the Spirit instead of the flesh, prayer reminds us of our purpose and existence, prayer reminds us of our identity. Prayer reminds us to walk in faith and not in fear. I urge you to rethink your life, rethink your position and oppose what your reality is saying to you by countering it with the word. God does not lie-he is faithful to see us prosper. He only thinks good things about us. Take heart and walk by faith. You are the beloved of the Lord