This is quite a retrospective post for me, I have had time to reflect on a lot of things that have happened in my life and I am quite happy to acknowledge the growth that has taken place in my life.
One of those things is realising that God places people in our lives for a season-and once that season ends you all have to move on.
I am reminded of the story about Elisha and Elijah-they shared a deep connection-so deep that Elisha saw what Elijah carried spiritually and asked for it before he departed. Elisha could let go of Elijah because he understood that the foundation of their relationship was God and not each other.
The mistakes we make in our friendships is that we don’t discern the times-we don’t know when it’s time to walk closely and when to walk away from each other-it doesn’t mean that the bond isn’t there-it just means the season to walk closely has come to an end and growth has to take place; God has to allow all that was imparted to take root without the other person so that we don’t end up idolising them.
I am in a season whereby I have asked God prayerfully about the season I am in in people’s lives and to be truthful-it has helped me guard my heart from bitterness. God has spoken so tenderly into my heart that it’s time to let that person go so that He can continue His work in their life-was it painful, ofcourse-but the beauty is that I have grown to realise that my season in their life is over-I imparted what I needed to and they imparted the same in my life.
I have really distanced myself from toxic friendships as well-I love those people but if we aren’t building each other up and we aren’t having sustaining conversations,it’s really ok to walk away. It doesn’t mean I hate you-it means I’m giving us space to appreciate the work we did in each other’s lives.
Also I have learnt that if someone excludes you from a season in their life- don’t fight to hold on-you’ll get hurt, pray for them and wish them well. God has really dealt with my heart to not allow bitterness to take root because it’s so tempting to start recalling how you were there for someone or how you helped them but God says “no,it was never about you!” It’s not easy cause you may feel like a used rag-but that is how the enemy robs us of the good things that we had learnt when we had that person in our life. Moving on doesn’t mean I have forgotten-it just means your part in my life is over and we will see each other again.
It’s amazing how selfish and entitled we feel to people-how we feel like we should know certain things about their lives and how easily offended we become when they don’t share those moments with us-so my hand is raised because honestly that’s how I was ( and I’m still working on it.) God just made me realise that I need to review my boundaries with people I walk with-you may think you are best friends but you are actually treated like a colleague or a good friend. It isn’t that person’s responsibility to make you aware of what you truly are in their life-you need to be conscious of the boundaries in that friendship and stick to them so that no one gets hurt.
All in all, I am happy – I feel unburdened, I am able to give into things I am truly passionate about without expanding myself and what I’m truly thrilled about is that I am really appreciative for the seasons I have been in with different people in my life.
I am growing ya’ll!